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One Day

As I stood in the doorway and watched my mother cry in my grandmother's arms, I realized something, I wasn't ready to go home either. For four days, I went to bed early, woke up early, ran the streets with family, and ate some of my favorite foods. I haven't been this stress free in a LONG time. No work, no bills, no traffic, life was pretty simple this week and I loved it. I'm going home, and I already miss my grandma, miss my cousins, miss the easy conversation with my brother, I miss the smile on my mother's face. I miss the simplicity.

This trip wasn't just about relaxation. It was also about understanding my family, and forgiveness. I was able to do something I'd been fighting against for a while, I forgave. I let go, and I've moved on. I let go of a memory that has haunted me since I was sixteen, and it feels good. It feels good to be at peace, and love someone with no restrictions.I wrote a lot on this trip, and I found clarity, and made decisions, and more than anything, I discovered that I'm going to be ok no matter what.

Now, I'm sitting in the car watching fields, animals, and old farm houses disappear, and I wait for the big busy city to appear. I wait for the familiar, and realize that I don't really want it, but I'll take it, because one day I'll return home. One day.
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